“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.  As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him.  Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.  The servant fell on his knees before him.  ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’  The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.  But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii.  He grabbed him and began to choke him.  ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.  His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, ‘Be patient with me; and I will pay you back.’ But he refused.  Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt.  When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.  Then the master called the servant in.  ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to.  Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’  In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.  This how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”        (Matthew 18:23-33)

     I’ve heard the comment recently from many people that everyone seems remarkably angry nowadays.  In general, I tend to agree.  Incidences of road rage are up; violent crime is rampant; filthy language masquerading as free speech is common; discontent with the government and disagreements  between political ideologies have led to extremely uncontrolled public confrontations.  Add to this mix the newish belief that “we have a RIGHT to be this angry” and the volatility of our society becomes more complete.  The world’s economic crisis being what it is and the moral neutrality we insist upon infecting even the Christian community, this situation is not particularly surprising.    What we who call ourselves believers must ask ourselves is this: do we indeed have the right to be this angry?  Is there a time when civility must be put aside in order to gain our advantage?

     There is such a thing as righteous anger.  Jesus Himself displayed it when He cast out the money-changers and merchants from the temple in Jerusalem. (See Matthew 21:12-13.)   He did not resort  to anger when He was arrested, nor when He appeared before Pilate and Herod, nor when He was nailed to the cross.  His anger was reserved for those who blasphemed by word or deed the holy name of God.  His anger did not manifest itself against those who were dying unknowingly in their sins–for them He showed compassion, mercy and the Way to eternal life.  He never showed anger towards those who could not accept Him, only sadness at their unrepentant condition.  He told His disciples (and therefore us) that “whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of judgment” (Matt. 5:22).  Now, I realise that “without a cause” may be a relative phrase, but it is important that we learn the difference between the world’s definition of sufficient cause and God’s definition of sufficient cause.  I am certain that the Lord becomes angry when we allow the abuse of children and those who are unable to care for themselves to go unchecked;  I believe He becomes angry when we allow our nations to turn their backs on His words regarding what is right and what is wrong in His sight, and when we bestow legitimacy upon the slaughter of our unborn or upon lifestyles He has condemned.   His anger is always righteous anger.  Is ours?  Or are we just reacting negatively to those with opinions that we do not share?  Are we allowing that anger to fester in our hearts until we can no longer feel love or compassion for those who have not yet come to a knowledge of the truth?  If so, then we also will come under the condemnation of Christ.  Further, what we do with that anger will make a huge difference to whether it will be acceptable to the Almighty or whether we will be condemned for it.  If our anger over the declining Godliness of our nations leads us to more boldly proclaim the Gospel of the risen Christ and to shine the light of His love more frequently into the dark places we encounter, then we are responding properly to the evil we wish to combat.  If we sound the alarm as watchmen on the wall and warn our fellow servants of the wrath to come , showing them at the same time that we are doing so out of love for them and concern for their eternal souls, we are channeling our anger properly.  If our language is bitter and as spiteful as that of the growing number of those who oppose the word of God, then we become worse than useless–we begin to work for the enemy. 

     There is, which is a great difficulty for many believers, sometimes a fine line between forgiveness and acceptance of evil.  Those who embrace the universalist point of view and believe that God, through Jesus, forgives all men of all sins whether they believe in Him or not, have crossed this line.  They refuse to believe in the God of scripture Who actively condemns evil and evildoers.  Even many well-meaning believers have come to the conclusion that there is virtue in bestowing their blessing on actions and behavior that God has forbidden.  We must never do this.  As Christians we are called upon to treat all people with respect and love, knowing that God loves us all and wishes for all to be saved.  We are also called upon to hate evil and to speak out against it wherever we may find it.  It is not always easy to reconcile the two duties.  We are to hate the sin, but love the sinner.  We are not to encourage the sinner to die in his state of sin.

     Let us say that we can show mercy and compassion towards those groups who oppose us in our walk with Christ, or towards those who we feel are leading our nation into ungodly ways.  Can we show that same mercy and compassion toward that person who hurt our feelings last night?  Toward that person who cheated us out of something we had considered ours by right?  Toward that person who behaved so unfairly or meanly  to us  that our hearts may be sore or even broken?  Jesus told Peter in Matthew 18:22 that we must forgive someone who acts against us “seventy times seven” times (490 times for those of us–like me–who have to work that out on paper).  Jesus knew how hard forgiveness comes for humanity.  Forgiving others is a choice we make, but it is not always an easy one, and it is likely to have to be repeated “seventy times seven” times before we get it through our heads that the forgiveness must be complete.  God said that He would forgive our sins and remember them no more, and that is how we are to forgive others.  We are to forgive them, and remember their sin no more.  Of course, we do not have the completely holy nature yet that God intended us to have at the time of our creation, and so we cannot truly forgive and forget as He does, but we can show compassion to our fellow servants in all situations, so that at Jesus soon return He will show compassion towards us.

Maranatha, my dear brothers-and-sisters-in-Christ!

Melissa

“…do not sin, and do not let the sun go down on your wrath…” (Eph. 4:26)

“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted,  forgiving one another as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.  By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”  (John 13:34-35.)

An e-mail acquaintance of mine recounted to me a dispute between two friends that is driving what appears to be a permanent wedge between them.  The cause was a relatively trivial annoyance that could have been almost immediately diffused had not pride taken hold of the two; with one refusing to apologize, and one unwilling to continue the friendship without the said apology.  I woke up this morning with this story on my heart, as God led me to the awareness of how common (and unscriptural) are these disputes that disturb our peace and dissolve friendships.  The Scriptures quoted above were not directed at heathens, pagans, and the ungodly.  They were aimed at us: the believers in Christ Jesus; we who have promised to follow the path of righteousness and to obey His covenant laws.  I’ve written before about the need to forgive those who have in one way or another abused or harmed us, but I haven’t before considered the need to address the petty squabbles and irritations that arise in our daily lives, and how they affect our relationships with ourselves and with the Lord.

“…if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way.  First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24)

These words of Jesus’ remind us how important it is to love each other and submit to God’s teaching about our relationships with others.  He knew that when we go to bed angry at someone, we will most likely awaken with a renewed and strengthened awareness of our grievances.  When that occurs, a little piece of the submission we offer to Christ has been turned to rebellion.  He does not want our sacrifices if they are not accompanied by contrite hearts laid at His feet for cleansing and renewal.  Swallowing our pride and humbly seeking the reconciliation of our relationships with those estranged from us must be accomplished before we approach the throne of God with our prayers and petitions for forgiveness; before we approach the altar at church for communion and worship.

“Then Peter came to Him and said, ‘Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?  Up to seven times?’  Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.’ ” (Matthew 18:21-22)

Wow!  490 times–another way of saying  you don’t stop forgiving your brother!  And guess what:  I didn’t tamper with or delete any of the text.  He did not say, “Up to seventy times seven, so long as your brother admits you were in the right.”  He did not say “Up to seventy times seven, as long as he apologizes nicely.”  Jesus was saying that we are to grant others forgiveness freely and without measure, just as He grants it to us.  Let me tell you, brothers and sisters, this isn’t always easy and will probably entail a great deal of effort to do, sometimes over a long period of time.  But this is what Jesus asks of us.  Sometimes, it can be accomplished immediately by putting our grievances in proper perspective.  Some of the things we become most irate about are often not  very important in the scheme of things.  When we take out the “me” element, we may see that our brother’s transgressions weren’t really all that diabolical to begin with.   We also need to look at the Lord’s reason for putting certain people in our lives.  He gives us our friends as gifts; to support us, to have fellowship and recreation with, and to share our joys and sorrows.  We must not be too quick to throw these gifts away, when a little thoughtful reflection would show us how important others are to our well-being.  Most of all, we need to remember that we are to reflect our relationship with God in our interactions with our friends and families.  When we refuse to surrender our pride and be reconciled to those around us, we are acting in direct rebellion against God.  If we refuse to forgive others, He will not forgive us.  If we say we love God but will not extend our hand of friendship to other believers, regardless of the circumstances, the Scriptures say that we lie.  How do we please God in our relationships?  Paul said it:  Be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving.  Remember that there is great power in the tongue, and that it can be used for both good and evil.  Don’t hold on to petty resentments.  Concentrate on what first drew you to a person rather than on the single thoughtless word or act, or personality trait, that has caused your annoyance.    Remember that you are a child of the most high God, and that you walk in the light!

Maranatha!

Melissa

Luke 23:34

     Jesus, the only begotten and beloved Son of the Most High God, who had lived a sinless and perfect life; who had healed the sick, cured the deaf and made the blind to see; who had preached salvation and the love of God to a fallen world died an excrutiating, humiliating and ignominious death on a Roman cross.  It is possible that few would blame Him had He called down the wrath of heaven upon the heads of those who attended to His crucifixion or upon the temple leaders who had called for His death.  Instead, His last words regarding those who put Him to death was a plea that His Father would show mercy to those who in ignorance drove nails into His hands and feet and would soon pierce His side with a spear.  Jesus forgave the unforgivable.  Is it possible for us to do the same?

     Scripture tells us to honor our fathers and our mothers, to love and respect our husbands or wives, to do good to those who hate us, bless those who curse us and pray for those who despitefully use us.  But what about the truly unforgivable acts that sometimes are committed?  In these last days, as love waxes colder and colder, we are seeing a horrendous upsurge in rape, murder, child abuse and molestation, and domestic violence.  Can a daughter who has suffered sexual abuse at the hands of her father, a wife who has suffered beatings from her drunken spouse,  a man who spent his childhood at the mercy of an cruel and abusive parent, a teenager who has been brutally assaulted because he owns a jacket someone else covets or a woman attacked as she’s getting into her car after work ever be able to let go of the very natural anger and resentment that fills their hearts?  Those who live through these horrors are generally named “survivors” by the popular press and  modern psychological thinking.  But God doesn’t want us to be survivors, He wants us to be victors!  He doesn’t want us to grit our teeth and “just get through it,” but to overcome all the horrible things that may have happened to us and go on to be strong, loving and Godly people. 

     I’m not going to kid anybody here who may be searching for emotional healing.  The wounds from severe abuse run deep and it is the rare person who can heal quickly even with the help from our Lord.  But please understand–healing IS possible.  Forgiveness is possible.  Joy is possible. 

     So many people who have suffered abuse cannot turn to the Lord because of an underlying feeling (acknowledged or not) that a loving God would not have allowed the abuse to occur.  I cannot entirely speak to that, because God has allowed many things to come about that I would have preferred He put a stop to.  He could have stopped the 9/11 hijackers from attacking the twin towers.  He could have put some kind of obstacle in Timothy McVeigh’s path as he proceded on his way to the bombing in Oklahoma City.  He could have struck down Hitler.  For that matter, He could have crushed the serpent Satan under His heel in the Garden of Eden before ever Adam and Eve could be enticed by visions of themselves being as gods.  He chose not to do so.  I suspect the reason is tied up in the gift of free will–freedom to make Godly choices; freedom to make ungodly ones.  At any rate, although I cannot say why God allows these horrible tragedies to take place, I can say with certainty that the answer to all the questions beginning ”where was God when…?” is that He was right there loving the victims, hurting with them, and waiting for them to turn to Him for comfort in their distress.  Just as He awaits all those who are victims of such abysmal abuse as we see today, desiring that they will turn to Him and allow themselves to be cradled and comforted in His loving embrace.

     Modern psychological thought tells us that we have every right not to forgive our abusers.  God, however, tells us to “forgive that we might be forgiven.”  As I’ve said before, anger and resentment grow at an alarmingly rapid pace, overshadowing our feelings of love and taking us far away from the will of God.  When we refuse to consider the power of forgiveness towards those who have wronged us, we open the doors of our hearts to evil.  We are told in Ephesians 6:12 that we “wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world…”  In striving to forgive we strike a blow against “the rulers of the darkness” who seek to devour our spirits and remove us from the care of our loving Father. 

     Joyce Meyer, the popular televangelist and author, has many times addressed the consequences of the sexual abuse she suffered as a child.  Like most children in the same situation she grew up bitter, controlling and unhappy until she learned of the healing power of Jesus, and His ability to help her learn to let go of the pain of the past.  In forgiveness she found peace, and saw her abusive father turn to the Lord before he died.  Her story is emotional, but not unique.  The Amish community showed a similar understanding of the Lord’s will for us in their public display of forgiveness and reconciliation after Charles Roberts shot to death a group of Amish schoolgirls in October of 2006. Paul learned these lessons as he preached to those who had him beaten and imprisoned and he learned to love his adversaries as Christ also loved them. Less spectacularly but just as surely, people in homes and congregations all over the world have found the freedom God intends for us in showing forgiveness to their enemies:  Freedom to love, freedom to laugh, freedom to serve His divine purpose. 

A few things to bear in mind as you consider applying the principle of forgiving the unforgivable to your own life:

—Sometimes forgiveness can be a slow process.  Begin by praying (even if it is through gritted teeth) for the person who has harmed you.  You may not mean it at first, or your prayer may be that he/she not be hit by a Mac truck.  If that’s the best you can do in the beginning as a prayer–then pray it!  It may take weeks, months or even years, but it is difficult to actively hate someone for whom you pray over a period of time.  Pray at the same time that God will take away your anger and resentment, even though the scars may remain.   

—Bear in mind that forgiveness is not synonomous with making someone your best friend.  For some appreciable time, forgiveness may grow much more quickly if you are not constantly in physical proximity with the person who has wronged you.  And, emphatically, for those who have been abused by an unrepentent parent (or a repentent one who has received no help), this does NOT mean you must or should allow your children to be around them unsupervised.  Forgiveness does not equate with a lack of common sense.  Nor should you put yourself in a position to be further abused!

—Remember that you cannot control what other people do, say or think.  You can only control your own reactions to them.  Even if you forgive, the one who has wronged you may not be grateful and may try to cause you more heartache.  Stay away.  Pray for them.  Hope the Holy Spirit will one day touch the hardness of their hearts and convict them of sin.  Act, but do not react to them.  Forgiveness is, to a large extent, between you and God rather than between you and the person involved.  If they are unrepentent, forgive anyway.

—Remember that Jesus loves you so much that He died and rose again so that you might live.  Remember He is ready and waiting for you to take to Him your anger and pain and hurt and leave it at His feet.  He is willing that you should climb into His lap and be comforted. 

“Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise!”  –Jeremiah 17:14

 If there is one concept in Scripture that has really given me a hard time during my Christian walk, this is it!  Unforgiveness, anger and resentment–can we ever entirely let them go?  I can’t answer from personal experience since my human nature has not yet allowed me to be completely free from these particular sins as yet, but take heart!  Philippians 1:6 says “…He which has begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ.”  Jesus loves us so much that He accepts our sometimes failed attempts to be righteous and continues to work in our hearts, cleansing us from our sins and gently leading us back onto His path.    Occasional failing at the tasks God puts upon our hearts is neither unusual nor unforgiveable–the great apostle Paul made mention of his own “thorn in the flesh” from which he prayed for deliverance, to be told by the Lord “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.”  If, when we sin, we go to the Lord with repentent hearts we will grow stronger in His grace and better able to withstand the wiles and assaults of the evil one.  But why did the wise Old Testament King Solomon enjoin us “not to let the sun go down upon your anger”?  Why did Jesus speak in such harsh terms about our unforgiveness towards others leading to God’s refusal to forgive us?

     Jesus said “Love one another as I have loved you.”  The truth is, to do this takes real effort.  Love is not just a temporary surge of emotion, but a way of life and a way of looking at those around us.  Love grows (sometimes slowly) with prayer, patience and faith.  Resentment and anger, on the other hand, can flare up quickly into an all-consuming hatred that will smother whatever joy and love is taking root in the heart.  God never sets arbitrary commandments upon us for His amusement–His laws are designed to bring us maximum happiness and the “peace that passes all understanding.”  He knows that if we allow hatred and unforgiveness to reign unchecked our love for Him and all He has created will grow cold.  I John 2:9-11: “He that says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness even until now. He that loves his brother abides in the light, and there is no occasion of stumbling in him.  But he that hates his brother is in darkness, and walks in darkness, and knows not where he goes, because that darkness has blinded his eyes.”    Loving the Lord and hating our fellow man cannot coexist.  Does that mean that we have to approve the actions of those who wrong us or who reject God and His word?  Not at all.  Certain judgments as to behavior have already been made by God and we as Christians need to be ready at all times to defend both our faith and the mandates of our all-holy God.  But the old axiom “hate the sin; love the sinner” holds true. Tell those who are walking the path of darkness that there is a way of light.  Tell the truth in love, not in anger and hate.  “Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you.” (Ephesians 4:32)  Easy?  Nope.  Completely possible in this fallen world?  Who knows?  As I said before, I have not yet achieved the goal of acquiring an entirely unresentful nature.  The best example in my memory of truly Godly forgiveness was that set by the Amish community a year or two back toward the family of the man who slaughtered nine Amish girls.  It would seem absolutely impossible that anyone could respond to that senseless tragedy with such selfless love–yet these people did.  Their outpouring of love and forgiveness won the admiration of believers and non-believers alike.  My prayer for myself and for all of you is that we might together wean ourselves from the unrighteous anger that is just one of the social ills plaguing us in these last days.  I will continue to press towards this goal, for “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me!”  (Philippians 3:13)